NECK PUNCH!You've seen these douchebags all around. They're swerving into you during rush hour, cutting you off in the grocery store checkout lines, and probably stealing your 401(k) fund without you ever even knowing it. These self-important, assclowns are SO IN DEMAND that they need to be on the phone all day long, 24/7. And they want YOU to know it.
So they run out and buy these Bluetooth headsets. What kind of bullshit is this? There are exactly two classes of people in the world who should maybe be wearing a Bluetooth device:
1) Military folk, while serving in the military. I'm not talking about some part-time weekend reservist who's lost in Home Depot and has to call Information to get directions on how to find his own ass and then how to make his way toward the exit. I'm talking about the brave men and women who are in service on the battlefront and need to keep in touch with the rest of their platoon.
2) Lobot. Since this group contains precisely one member, this ain't you, Dakota. Get that goddamned thing out of your ear and concentrate on driving your ridiculous Humvee home from the mall.
1 comment:
Same fucking guys 10 years ago were walking around with 20 pound cellphones connected to a fucking satchel, talking to NOBODY, just to show off that they could afford the useless thing. Now it's this fucking BlueTooth crowd. Maybe the first couple of weeks when those came out it was cool, but here's a note to you, Douchebags of America: Once EVERYONE has one, once Larry the Asslicking Sales guy that comes into your office to hand out his handdrawn business cards even though there's a NO SOLICITING sign clearly posted on the door, once HE has one, then they're NOT FUCKING COOL anymore.
COME ON.
Get a fucking clue. And stop walking around in stores on those fucking things. You look like crazy people talking to yourselves. Assholes.
It's. A. PHONE. You can't just HOLD IT TO YOUR EAR???!?!?!
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